Sharing your cancer diagnosis

Choose a good listener

You may not need someone to give you advice or tell you what to do. Instead, you may want someone who wants to hear about and try to understand what life is like for you right now. You may need to look outside your family to find such a person.

Choose a good time to share

Sometimes people will send signals to let you know they’re willing to talk about cancer with you. Sometimes you can ask others about their thoughts and feelings.

Understand feelings of anger

Sometimes angry words come from emotions other than anger, like frustration, worry, or sadness. Try to figure out why you feel angry and why you need to express it. Don’t run away from these feelings—share them and try to understand them.

Be true to your feelings

Remember that it’s okay to be in a bad mood. You don’t have to pretend to be cheerful when you’re not. This can keep you from getting the help you need.

If you’re not ready to share

You have full control of when, if, and how much you share about your diagnosis. Although talking about it may not be easy at first, most people find that sharing their thoughts and feelings helps them deal with their cancer.

Turn to community support

You might find it helpful to talk about your feelings with people who aren’t family or friends. Instead, you might want to meet in a support group with others who have cancer or talk with a counselor. Check out these online resources and organizations in your community.